What's this? It Smells Like... Positivity!

Anyone who knows me in real life knows that while I'm certainly prone to being an ornery motherfucker, it's certainly not the only facet of my being. I am capable on occasion of being amused, pleased, perhaps even elated should something strike me in such a manner. So today there'll be something different on the menu. Instead of compiling yet another list of things that annoy me (midterms, studying, midterms, reading, midterms), here now, are things that I'm pleased with most recently.

-Fallout 3 - I just got this last night at midnight, and considering I had an early-ish class today and scant breaks, have still logged over 5 or so hours of play in every odd moment I've had enough time for the xbox to boot up. Now, I wasn't gaming back when fallouts 1 and 2 were big, and while I've been slowly working on fallout 2 here and there, I feel like some things you just miss out on if you don't get to enjoy it in its original context (I didn't even have a computer that ran windows until about 1998. Running reader rabbit would have strained the machines I grew up with). Anyway, I'm in no way qualified to comment on how this game stands out in the series, but it's good enough that my impending midterm on Thursday has me legitimately pissed that either the test or the game couldn't have come a week later. If something gets its claws into me that quickly, I think it deserves a mention.

-Shogun by Trivium - The last album from these guys sowed the first seeds of doubt in my mind about the future of heavy music. They went from being easily one of my top 5 favorite bands in late high school to simply falling back into the rank and file of faceless metalcore acts. Suffice to say, I didn't care much when they released a new album, but because I am a torrent-whore, I downloaded it anyway. Now, ascendancy, this certainly ain't, but here is what has re-sold me on the band: They admitted that The Crusade was a piece of shit. They might not have used those words, but they talked about how they created a record that couldn't resonate with the fans, and when you factor out the PR spin, then yeah, they just admitted their last record was shit. And yet Metallica still defends creating that abortion that was St. Anger.

-Play n' Trade - For all of you NYC gamers out there, this place is a gem. It is a diamond in a sea of gamestop turds. This is motherfucking Mecca. The store is located on 13th street between 3rd and 4th avenue, and after checking out their various services, I see no reason to ever patronize a Gamestop again. First off, their buyback prices can't be beat. I traded in Too Human, Final Fantasy III, and Sonic Rush Adventure and got two new copies of No More Heroes and Contra IV (somewhere around 50$ worth of stuff) and only went 75 cents over on my trade-in credit. Had I gone to gamestop, I probably wouldn't have even been able to get Contra. Secondly, they are friendly as hell. I went there at midnight to pick up my pre-order for Fallout yesterday (today?) and started talking to one of their employees about old school PS2's (the fat ones), Penny Arcade, and upcoming releases we were excited about. When midnight rolled around and he was allowed to sell me my game, he threw in a free skin for my PS2 because I was the first one to show up that night and offered to let me upgrade to the collector's edition of Fallout even though I had preordered the standard. Had I gone to gamestop, they simply would have asked if I would like to preorder anything else before forgetting I was there so they could rob someone else. I mean, I could extoll the virtues of this place ad nauseam, and I encourage anyone looking to make console related purchases (they don't sell PC stuff unfortunately) to check them out, because they deserve the business more than gestappostop (to steal a line from dueling analogs) ever will.

Wow, I think I'm gonna die from all of these sunbeams and puppy dog smiles coming out of my ass.

Fuck You, Mr. Malakian

Yeah. See that guy up here? Fuck that guy. Fuck him in his stupid whiny ass.

Those of you who might recognize this individual or the name "[Daron] Malakian" might be wondering: "why, Michael, why have you turned your back on the guitarist for the one and only mighty System of a Down?" Don't worry, my reasoning is good.

See, Daron here is heading up his own side project (Scars on Broadway) while SOAD is on hiatus and over the last couple of months, I have been listening to them pretty regularly. It's no System to be sure, but I liked it more than Serj's solo album and it had enough good tracks to earn a pretty prestigious spot in my itunes play counts. I enjoyed this album enough, in fact, that a little less than a month ago I bought tickets to one of their upcoming shows set for the end of October. I'm not a big fan of going to shows alone, however, and finding people willing to drop $25 on the ticket was tougher than I thought. Late last night/early this morning, depending on how you want to look at it, I decided to see if tickets were still on sale so that I could know if I should still bother pestering people to go with me. Imagine my surprise when the Irving Plaza website had the show listed as "cancelled". Suffice to say, I immediately went over to their myspace to see what the fuck happened to the show I had been anticipating for almost a goddamn month. Turns out, this had happened a few weeks ago, although the tour was slated to start a week after Daron decided to cancel, so I still feel vindicated in my outrage, as that is a pretty cocktastic move to pull. But what, pray tell, was the reason? After all, for such a sudden move, this cocksucker had better have a good one. Here's the most informative line of Daron's "explanation":

"now is a time when aspects of my life need to be tended to"

WHOA, there! Don't go unloading your life story on me pal! I could post the rest of it, but I feel that there is nothing else there that offers any clarification, just more pitiful attempts at Daron rationalizing cancelling an entire tour a week before it was slated to start. The official statement from the band's publicist simply stated that "Malakian concluded that his heart wasn't into touring at the time" They then go on to say that there is no plan to reschedule.

Excuse me? Are you fucking kidding me? You write and perform music for a living you whiny fuck. The pisser is that he may have a legitimate reason, but for some reason feels he doesn't owe his fans any clarification beyond "I don't wanna do it now". Some valiant myspacers have been quick to point out that "blah blah blah he's entitled to a personal life blah blah blah maybe if I defend this outright dickishness vehemently enough Daron will notice me and like me blah blah puke". Allow me to point something out:

Daron Malakian is a celebrity. He might not be on the same tier as that Hilton twat or Brittany Spears, but the bottom line is that he puts himself out in the public eye for a living and essentially puts himself and his music on display. When you become a celebrity, the very definition of the word means that no, you don't get to have much of a private life. And you can be damn shure that when you cancel a tour a week before the scheduled start and offer NO explanation other than half-assed excuses and poorly worded vagaries, people will remember you as the guy that cancelled a tour for apparently no fucking reason, not what as a poor suffering artist.

I'm not asking for all of the gruesome details, but come the fuck on. You can be vague but still give people enough of a clue as to why you pulled the rug out from under them all of a sudden. You have testicular cancer? "I've been advised that it would be medically unsound for me to do this tour after learning some new information". Some kind of death? Fine, don't even say who. Even if you just said "some kind of death" it would be infinitely better than the shit us fans were fed. Drug Problem? well you could... ah who am I kidding? Have you heard System of a Down? They've probably run out of drugs to do and had to start resorting to BZ just to feel anything. But you see what I'm getting at? You don't need to post pictures of your tumor, but let us know you're under the weather.

Or just cancel the tour with no explanation. Like a bitch.

On Idiots

I, uh, I have no really reasonable introduction so to speak, so I'm just going to dive right in here. As everyone is painfully, painfully aware, we have this election thingy coming up in just a few weeks. It's kind of, you know, a big deal and stuff. Anyhow, this particular election has provided a great window into a government gone wrong, a media just now beginning to regrow their testicles, and of course, Sara Palin in a bikini. Most importantly though, it's given me a few more reasons to hate a whole lot more people with such vitriol that I think I might actually explode. Allow me to Enumerate:

People who shrug off any information or issues with "I don't care about politics"
OK, where to begin with these fuckers? First of all, there's always the smarmy fucking way they say it, like they're too good to keep up to date. Because, you know, staying informed on the workings of your government is totally lame. Who cares if they're deliberating how best to just GIVE the very banks that are responsible for this clusterfuck we're in 700 BILLION fucking dollars of our money with no oversight or strings attached? Gossip Girl is on tonight and you just have to see what witty puns Kristen Bell will come up with this week. I don't even care about the social aspects here, as we can all agree that the government fucking with those is retarded. I am talking about opportunities to learn about the people who might be mandating what we do for the next 4-8 years. Here's a fucking clue: if you "don't care about politics" because you're disenchanted with the system, you are (and I will Italicize for emphasis) part of the fucking problem, not a part of the fucking solution. You are directly responsible for how out of control our Government has gotten because rather than keep up with what's going on so you can raise your voice before the problems arise, you sit there grinning with smug self satisfaction that you're not participating until you're living in a cardboard box giving rim jobs for pocket change wondering where all of your fucking money went. Here's a news flash assholes: you still live in this country (at least until we're bought out by China completely), so even if you "don't care" you are above or immune to absolutely fuck all. And when you're cleaning the shit from between your teeth after your 3rd rusty trombone of the evening, I will lean over to you from MY cardboard box and steal your floss.

People who think they are revolutionaries exacting change by not voting
(no Joel, this is not in reference to you. Your post earlier today was an example of a non voter with a good argument, plus I actually started writing this last week)

I can't decide if I hate these people more or less than the above. I'm not talking about people who simply don't vote (I have no real right to talk as I wasn't registered until right before I turned 21), but the ones who deliberately say they aren't voting because of the corrupt system or politicians all being the same or some other 19-year-old-who-just-discovered-Nietzsche stupid bullshit argument and think they are way smarter than you for figuring this out. They will proudly sit on their throne lording over you that "like, nothing will ever change, man". Well here's a fucking clue: it sure as shit won't change if you don't fucking do something about it. In case you haven't noticed, plenty of people (around half of the adult populace) don't vote and yet has it made a difference? It sure as fuck doesn't make any more of a difference than if you do. My point is, you certainly have your right to vote or not vote as you see fit, but if you expect anyone to give a shit that you're not voting because you're so fucking informed that you "see right through all the lies" or whatever, then don't be surprised when nothing changes, because I guarantee no one in Washington cares about your fucking vote. You are a statistical zero as an individual and they know where you won't vote, somebody else will. They say that people who don't vote don't have a right to complain, and I don't wholly agree on that point: People who think their not voting changes a single fucking thing don't get a right to complain because all they are doing is finding an excuse for their apathy.

If anyone wants the cliffs notes to this, read the headings in bold, and this gem from Harlan Ellison. It sums up my feelings on the matter quite well:

HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT. FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.